idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Randomize
