I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
