I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
