Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
