those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
