My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
she smelled like a LAN party
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
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