yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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