So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
this boner is exhausting
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
