You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I touched a dick in church today
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
