just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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