the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
