YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
