If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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