You made me cry and you don't even care
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
