I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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