I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Shitshow foam night was such a success
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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