As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
