Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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