Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
