i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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