I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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