you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
