Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
