I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
