Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
ok first of all what the fuck
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
