Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
