wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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