I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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