Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
