I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
