You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Also, beer. Big fan.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
