tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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