I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
