i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I am one with the molecules
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
