covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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