Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
