Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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