i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Randomize
