just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
