I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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