I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
