You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
