I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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