i already hear my dad disowning me
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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