she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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