All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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