all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
