I like my sex mixed with concussions.
North Korea, Best Korea!
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize