Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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