Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
