redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize