i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
